Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Who Likes Short Shorts? Really? (Part 1)

This is "The Page" reporting in at Griffyn Mirages control center. We have a breaking news story straight from the frontlines, I cannot delay any longer, and I will let you listen to our local correspondent, "Le Pagè".

That’s right "The Page", today I, "Le Pagè", took the first steps into Canada's most recent war zone, ground zero I prefer to call it. "But what war could that be?” you ask? I dare not speak it's name, I fear it might curse us all, just like screaming Macbeth from up-stage right. What I will say is that it's horrific, the carnage... it's... it's... everywhere! I don't know what kinds of people to do this... what’s that? We have some incoming images...

These are just a few images of the suspects arrested for questioning in connection with... this!

Do you not see what the world is coming to? Do these hooligans really think long weekends are a reason to do this? Unfortunately... yes. What you see here is the complete and utter destruction of Ontario's only party beach...Wasaga. Oh it pains me to see this horrendous site, how could such a pristine site turn into "this" after only a few days of hardcore drinking, bonfires, mass bikini sales, and melanoma.

... what’s that? Oh sorry viewers, I guess it's time for a commercial from our sponsors…


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